Little Picasso

I can't remember if I've told all of you about our friend Miss Judy. She is Lois's Infant Educator through the Early Intervention Program. For those of you who didn't give birth to kids with a little something extra, Early Intervention is a federal program that provides services to children with developmental delays. You have to qualify based on the severity of your delays- not a problem for a child with Down Syndrome - and in nost cases, it's not exactly free. But it helps kids like Lois, who have a few extra challenges, get a good head start. At age 3, Lois will graduate from Early Intervention and the school system will take over providing her with the services she needs. All of this sounds great in theory, right? But of course, in practice, it isn't quite so simple or so straightforward.

In fact, I've spent a lot of time in the past 18 months wringing my hands about Early Intervention. Things here in Chesterfield County are VERY different than they were in Montgomery County and it's been a bit of an adjustment for me. The first infant educator we had here in Richmond? Well, let's just say she and I didn't' see eye to eye. I don't want to bad mouth her, because she did give me some suggestions for Lois that worked. But her people skills left something to be desired. So - as so often has happened in Lois's short life (i.e. Harriet the NICU nurse, Dr. Kraft, etc.) - we happened upon just the right person at just the right time. We were assigned a new Infant Educator - Miss Judy - and the rest is history.

Miss Judy cares about Lois, and I believe cares about our family. She gives me a list of homework every week - what sounds Lois is working on, songs we should sing, signs to work on, gross motor skills to practice. I'm lucky to be able to keep up - and so is Lois. Every time Lois accomplishes something we've been working on together, I believe Miss Judy is just as excited as we are. I can't tell you what that means to me as a mother. Lois needs a big a cheering section as she can get - and I think Miss Judy might deserve a nomination for Head Cheerleader.

This week, Miss Judy stuck Lois in her high chair, strapped a bib on her, and handed her a paint brush. I have to confess, my first thought was , "Oh, this is going to be good." She gave Lois a single sheet from one of those coloring books where the paper is impregnated with paint and all you have to do is run a wet paintbrush over the paper. She filled a cup with a little water - showed Lois how to dip the brush in the water - and then waited to see what would happen. And what do you know?



She did it.



And she kept doing it.


She was quite fastidious about returning to the cup to get more water.


I couldn't believe it. Hello Mommy guilt! I didn't think for one second Lois would be able to do this. I figured the brush would go in her mouth and the cup of water would end up on the floor for the dogs to clean up. Way to underestimate your kid, Catherine.

But I know we've talked about this before. It's hard to find the right set of expectations for your "special" child. I know a couple of parents who are falling into the trap of having expectations that are WAY too high for their DS child and I worry what effect that will have on them later in life. But I think the opposite end - the one I keep falling prey to - maybe even more harmful.

I didn't read "What to Expect the First Year" because I didn't want to hold Lois to an unfair standard. (I AM reading it now - since I think I'm now more scared of parenting a "typical" child than I am of parenting my bean. But that's another post all together.) I've tried very hard to encourage Lois - seek the advice of professionals when needed - support her development in any way I can. I can honestly say it doesn't bother me to see other 18 month old babies running circles around my girl (literally and figuratively). She is who she is and I love her for it. I long ago learned that Lois has her own timetable for her development and I am just along for the ride. But maybe I need to start finding a happy medium? Maybe I need to set the bar a little higher.

Wait a minute. Didn't I already have this epiphany a few months ago? Sheesh. Who is the one with learning difficulties? Me or Lois?

I think for now, we're doing just fine. Jay and I have been amazed at the gains Lois has made in the past few months. Who deserves the credit? Shiny pink orthotics? Miss Judy, educator extraordinaire? PT? Momma and Daddy? I think we should just give all the credit to the butter bean.

Now if we could just get that hair under control.....