Fat Boy Slim is Five Months Old

In the past five months we have learned several things we didn't know.


1. Having a boy baby is different from having a girl. Wow. My friend Jen tried to tell me that, but I don't think I really understood it until Jay heard the thundering sound of Mac's heels hitting the changing table as I changed his diaper from the other floor of the house. This guy is in motion 85% of his day. He's strong. He's insistent. He's pushy. He squeals. He makes faces that leave little doubt in your mind about his mood. He's all of the things Lois wasn't as a baby. I know what you're thinking. It's that pesky little extra chromosome. But I really don't think so. He's just a force of nature, while Lois was a delicate little imp. I think we're in trouble.


2. Sleep is important. Uninterrupted sleep. Sleep during the hours of 11pm - 6am. There is no substitute for a full night's sleep. Mac started sleeping through the night when he was about 3 months old. That lasted about 3 weeks, and suddenly he was up anywhere from 1am - 3am looking for bottle. Maybe we shouldn't have fed him? But when it's 3am and your baby is screaming like a wolverine is tearing his arms and legs off, you tend to look for the easiest way to make the ugly noise stop and to get yourself back in the bed. Luckily, he seems to have decided that he'll throw us a bone and start sleeping through the night again. Thank you, Mac. The sound you just heard was Jay and I heaving a HUGE sigh of relief.


3. Big babies are fun to look at. Poor Mac gets toted around town quite a bit as we try to keep up with Lois's plethora of therapy and doctor appointments. I can't make it down an aisle in the Target without someone stopping me to make eyes at Mac. Yes, it IS nice that people think he's a cute little beast - but I dread being asked how old he is and then seeing their eyes widen at my answer. Look people. I'm not feeding him Dunkin Donuts for breakfast. I don't put Hershey's syrup in his formula. He's just BIG. I thought the nurse at Lois's CAT scan had partaken in one too many illegal substances as a youth when she asked me if they were twins. But in the short time I spent looking for Ralph Lauren castoffs at the Goodwill yesterday, I was asked 3 times if they were twins. *sigh.


4. Our house is too small. Adding one baby to this house seems to have made it shrink in size exponentially. Everyone has their own room, and we still have a guest room, but I feel like there is "kid" stuff stashed in every available corner. We're seriously considering dismantling our dining room, taking the furniture to the attic, and designating it as a playroom. I have a feeling that when Mac starts moving we're going to need the option of penning that boy in.


5. Things are harder for Fat Boys. No, Mac is NOT rolling over. No, he's NOT sitting up. The pediatrician tells me that is to be expected because of his size. His girth. His shar-pei thighs. Do I care that he's a little behind in his gross motor development? Do you really need to ask? Been there. Done that. Still doing that. I think I've got a handle on it. Thanks.