Looks Can Be Deceiving

Hello gentle blog readers. Patient blog readers. Faithful blog readers. I thank you for your emails of concern and general harassment regarding my blogging silence over the past two months. All is well here at Chez Hogan, but we are only now emerging from what will certainly be remembered as the most difficult months of our lives. Difficult. It's late, and I'm having trouble coming up with a better word -because honestly, friends, difficult doesn't begin to do justice to the physical and emotional turmoil we've suffered at the hands of this young man:

Oh, I know he's cute. And he looks sweet and harmless in all his cute baby nakedness. But looks can be deceiving, people. Mac is a difficult baby. Don't listen to YaYa when she tells you he's a "good baby." No he isn't. NO HE ISN'T!


Here he is looking all happy again. WHEE! I'm riding on Daddy's knee! But what this picture doesn't tell you is that 1 hour before it was taken he was screaming his head off like a wild animal. We're talking out of body experience, people. And what was the root cause of this break with reality? I made the foolish mistake of leaving the house with him. Silly me thought we could enjoy some family time at Aunt Martha's on Christmas Eve. Ahah! Silly me! Mac does not appreciate any kind of break in his routine. Leave the house after 5pm and you better bring ear protection and a change of clothing because his mindless screaming has been known to cause incontinence in his adult caregivers.


I don't remember when this photo was taken, but I'm sure 5 minutes after flashing this endearing little grin he started screaming again. He is difficult. I can't say it enough times.



I know what you're thinking. Lots of parents deal with cranky babies, and it doesn't cause them to take a 2 month hiatus from everything that brings them pleasure. Yes - but not only does my baby scream - he doesn't sleep. We're talking 3 or 4 wake ups a night. Sometimes he wants to eat. Other times he's ready to play. Occasionally a change of venue is all that is required. Bottom line? No one is sleeping. For some reason Lois decided she isn't going to sleep well, either. So about the time we finally get Mac in bed, Lois wakes up.


But it's a New Year - and with the New Year came some significant changes at Chez Hogan. We decided to stop letting Mac run the show - (that's right! WE'RE in charge here!) - and 6 nights ago we let Mac "cry it out." For each of those 6 nights he's had anywhere from 3 to 46 (but who's counting?) minutes of screaming and crying followed by a full 12 hours of sleep. And Momma and Daddy have had a full 8 hours of sleep. And it's a whole new world. Those 46 minutes were some of the most heartbreaking of my life - but it was worth every second of misery.


People will try to convince me that I am the one who is different. With a full night's sleep I am more patient with Mac and more able to handle his "quirks." But honestly, I think it is Mac who is different. I think it's all together possible that my difficult baby was just never well rested. He's no longer difficult. We've taken him out of the house after 5pm twice now and had no out of body experiences as a result. He's sleeping. We're sleeping. Life is good.


I love my son with every fiber of my being. But for a couple of months I didn't' like him very much. My friend Beth gave me permission to say that out loud. Some of you will judge me for that. But I'm sure there are others of you who can appreciate the sentiment. Those select few of you who operated on 4 hours of sleep a night and allowed your crying babies to cause you to lose bladder control. I know who you are. And I salute you.

I'm happy to be back with lots of Lois news - and even a little Mac news that doesn't contain biting sarcasm about his difficult demeanor. Let's take it slowly though, shall we? I'll be back with Lois's school pictures in a few days. Stay tuned.

Mac - if you are reading this as a teenager, I'm sorry I let you cry and didn't answer. But you were a royal pain in the butt, kid.

And I'm sorry I didn't buy you blue pacifiers and made you use your sister's pink ones and then posted pictures of it on the internet.